4 Tips On Making Great First Impressions (and Benefiting from Them)!

by C.J. Taylor | Jul 29, 2023 | Networking

First Impressions

It takes as little as seven seconds for someone to form an opinion about you (Fun Fact #1), or a tenth of a second if you just glance at them (Fun Fact #2). Even if facts contradict whatever impression you have presented them with, (“them” being the important stranger of your choice), they will often still subconsciously rely on the first impression of you to make decisions (Fun Fact #3). This makes first impressions invaluable for getting your foot through the door or just making a connection, whether the important stranger in question is a new client for your freelance job, an admissions officer for your future college, or the next-door neighbor who moved in last week. Here are four tips to put together a great first impression and how to get something out of it!

Dress Appropriately

A first impression stemming from how you clean up can last six months or longer (Fun Fact #4), so it should go without saying that dressing in an athletic tank top and bright red Nike shorts may not be the best outfit for a business meeting; we all know that matte black Nike shorts match much better! 

In all seriousness, dressing for the occasion and the weather both factor into your first impression; as nice and clean as a plaid shirt with a pair of jeans would look, it wouldn’t make sense to wear them during a college campus tour in the middle of July. Now the admissions officer you introduced yourself to during the opening statements has counted that into their first impression of you. Now that we have the obvious out of the way…

Dress like you. Your first impressions need to be positive, yes, but they also must reflect you. When Riley (or the important stranger of your choice) shakes your hand for the last time during the interview and goes home, you want Riley to know precisely what kind of person you are. Yes, the questions they asked during the interview will help form that mental profile of you, but their mental image of you will be much more influential. Don’t get me wrong, dressing TOO comfortably can send the wrong message, but dress in something that you are comfortable being seen in. Think of it as a picture you are taking; make sure that Riley has a picture of you that you would approve of.

Approach with Confidence

Alright, you have your polo shirt and a pair of cargo shorts that you like, and now you are strolling around the science fair nearing the end of your college campus visit (true story). Then, you spot Dr. Charlie (again, the important stranger of your choice) standing and greeting other individuals. You know Dr. Charlie most likely has some very, very important information, and it would be amazing to get their business card. To accomplish these goals, you have to approach them; don’t wait for them to approach you. They won’t. 

When you approach Dr. Charlie, shake their hand and ask them for their name. A simple, “Good morning/afternoon Mrs/Ms/Mr/Dr/Prof…” will do, even if you don’t know their name, because they will most likely finish the sentence for you. Make sure that (and I can’t stress this enough) you have a meaningful question to ask beforehand. Shaking hands and exchanging names won’t do, nor will a flippant question that only requires a flippant response. It is easy to tell between someone who is trying to ask a question just to ask a question and someone genuinely interested in the topic at hand. Think about what you’d like to get out of an interaction with Dr. Charlie and form a question with some substance to get straight to the point and spur some conversation. 

For example, my Dr. Charlie was a director of a program I wanted to get into, so I asked her, “What are you looking for in applicants that would give them an edge?” Straightforward, nothing too complicated, but something that spurs conversation and would lead to more questions. This is all to form trust.

A little side note before moving onto the third tip; this goes for instances where Dr. Charlie is approaching you. Be welcoming; you want Dr. Charlie to be here, so make them feel like that. 

Listen

Assuming you have met Prof. Jordan (an important stranger of your choice, this time full of wisdom), you will need to listen. This is not hard, as most people have active listening skills. However, while Prof. Jordan is explaining the Marvel Cinematic Universe in its entirety, they will be reading you to see if their indispensable wisdom is being received. There are plenty of different ways to assure your Prof. Jordan that you are actively listening to what they have to say; the first and most notable form is body language. 

Make eye contact, stand tall with ten toes down (or sit up if you are sitting; yes, I said ‘no slouching’), give feedback when they finish a sentence by nodding or a simple, “Mm-hmm,” and make sure you DO NOT fidget. Cross your arms, put your hands at your side (don’t put them in your pockets), and hold them in front of you or behind you, but for the love of all that is irritating, do not fidget with anything when you are listening to someone. One in three people have what is called misokinesia, the hatred of movement, so fidgeting drives them mad. To others, all you do is tell them that you aren’t listening, even if you are!

Another way you can show that you are listening is by repeating back points previously mentioned; even if you are mistaken, Prof. Jordan will often correct you. Remember, they are the expert on the MCU, not you, so they won’t expect you to understand things inside-out immediately. Asking questions shows that you are listening; if you don’t have one, maybe ask Prof. Jordan to expand on something they briefly mentioned. 

Take notes; if you are in a panel/workshop setting, taking notes is acceptable, but with a one-on-one conversation, maybe hold off on taking notes. Unless you have a notepad and pen, using electronics while they are speaking may send the wrong message. If you can have someone else take notes, or better yet, record your conversation (with Prof. Jordan’s consent, of course), then that would be even more beneficial. At the end of the day, both of your goals are the same; transfer information from Prof. Jordan’s head to yours. If they know their information is making the trip (they know you are listening), most people would love to tell you more. Lastly…

Save their contact away from family and friends (for example, I have a “College/Connections” list for people like Riley, Dr. Charlie, and Prof. Jordan on my phone), and make sure to add a note to help you remember that the number you saved is that specific Prof. Jordan who told you that Iron Man was born in Manhattan. It would be tragic to save an important number just for you to delete it later because you forgot who “Jordan” is. 

Be Human

If you are a robot, please skip this section…

Now that have strictly humans with emotions here, consider this; Riley, Dr. Charlie, Prof. Jordan, and whichever important stranger just came to your mind, are all human. They sleep, eat, and breathe, just like you (hopefully). Their work isn’t the only thing that defines them, so be human with them. When they have dispensed their wisdom and you have made your connection with them, doing something as small as making a light-hearted joke or telling them what you may be doing next can make you seem much friendlier (which will factor into your first impression), especially if you are not the only one seeking what they have to offer. You can ask for their name again (or repeat it if they just gave you their information), you can shake their hand once more, and you can finish the conversation with some closing remarks. Something like, “This has been great! Thank you! Have a great day!” is perfectly fine.

You know the saying; you never get a second chance to make a first impression. Your first impression is the profile the important stranger in your life makes of you. Whether applying for a job or your local chess club, your first impression will stick with you for a long time, so make it a good one. Any thoughts you would like to share? Let me know down below. Remember, hate the sin, not the sinner.

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves.

Philippians 2:3 NIV